Sunday, November 15, 2009

Diversity...a word I like

It's kind of funny to me how it's November and we have weather that to others (myself included) is quite warm. I like it that way because I get cold so easily. Mmmm...I'm thankful for Fall colors and the weather Fall brings.

Who knew that every year brings new revelations about yourself and about how the world really works? I feel like I'm going through now what most people went through during their teenage years. At least, emotionally and relationally. But it's good to remember that everyone is different and I've always been "behind" people developmentally in certain areas. God made me that way, though, and so that brings me peace! Haha, I always use the example of how my adult teeth would always come in later than most of the kids and I used to be jealous in elementary. Diversity is great and comparison to others can be detrimental to growth if you let it. That's my opinion and I find myself comparing constantly, not that it's always a good thing or always a bad thing.

I still haven't sent out thank you letters to people for my trip to Mexico City :S. I've got everything near-ready, but I guess it isn't as big of a priority as others things this semester. I could be better at a lot of things, but I've gotten tired of putting myself down for not doing everything on my list (which is nonexistent at the time).

I got my hair cut. Really short. I like it and I like people's reactions, haha! If anything, I would like to do something fun similar to that often, just to surprise people. It's definitely quicker to wash. I talked to my mom prior to doing it and was thinking about not doing it because I was afraid I would be doing it for the "wrong" reason - to look older (so I might care too much about what others think about me). But really, I doubt myself too much. I am blessed with the money to do it, I hadn't gotten my hair cut in 6 months and I just felt like changing it up. And is there really anything wrong about wanting to look older than 15? Haha, I don't know if I do now, but I enjoy it the way it is. And I like the fact that it's a lot like a boy's haircut...I think I'll go shorter on top the next time! Sorry I don't have any pictures yet, hehe.

It's getting to the time where I am thinking a lot about what I'm going to do after I graduate. I'm considering Teach for America, I'm going to look for places to apply here in Las Cruces and other places in New Mexico (maybe in other states, but I'm not so much a fan of that). I also would really like to go on a mission trip because I've never been on one overseas and I would love to share the gospel through building relationships and doing service work. I sometimes feel bad for getting "worn out" earlier than others if it comes to physical labor, but I still like building things.

I'm also glad I get to go to Los Alamos for Thanksgiving and I get to see some family members! The break is looking wonderful, but I will enjoy every day until then :) Why is it so hard for me to be happy for others or for myself when good things happen...even when there's beautiful weather? I've got a lot of questions that run through my head lately without ever being answered. I also have a lot more to say, but I'll end this entry here. (To be continued....at least, I'll try to :P )